Fear and shame.

Daer Diary,

As i am writing now, i am still shocked by the events i lived yesterday and my night was not whole resting, having the fear running in the veins.
I was the human toy of two DeRais Ladies... They played with me, they used their skills to forced me to undress and dance in front of their Marchese Lord zarek. They proved that i am just a pet in their hands... even in the hands of my protector. They opened my eyes and made me see the true side of DeRais, all of them.
At the end, i was told to be dropped in a tavern, escorted by a lady... but i don't wanted to go in a inn .. i was just in need to be alone, in isolated place, the Chapel. Why the DeRais was following me ? Because i was not going to the tavern as Lord Zarek ordered ? Why she threatened me and tried to bring me reason ? I was too mad, frightened, ashamed and disappointed to be leaded more.
Fortunately, i hid two daggers in this Chapel . and i was ready to defend myself when she attacked. She made errors... She was weakened by her thirst, i was ready to do anything to save myself, full of rage and fear... but more, i was trained at fight by Lord zarek himself ! This good mixture saved my life... until next time.

But is was not the end of my fears... Diary.

When i was going back home, this little room where i sleep, At Arsenal... I knew the two DeRais ladies were teasing my friend Terra. And i was not able to stay out this business ... i yelled them to leave him be. I fast gave up when Lady Zandra came to help him ... so i just stepped in a corner to be forgotten ... Too late.

Too late, i became a target... but i just wanted to stay... Worse, i just needed to stay close my protector. Just because of that connection and my damn claiming blood. The distance brings me pain and burn in veins ... and i was not able to move away from the Arsenal. I was not able to leave until a rentee came and brought me with force from there...

Back at Arsenal, i walked silently toward my room and tried to find some rest... the fear haunting my dreams.

Gioia.